Genius

Dear Diary,

I'm a genius.

I have a plan!

Tantric sex.

This wonderful creation can cure both problems at once. Raise John's self-confidence and take control of his unruly sperm (shy sperm?) without them suspecting a thing (the sperm, that is). They're going to be dancing to my tune now.

All I need to do is start when I'm not fertile, so John doesn't think it's a ploy. Which it is. It's important that he think it's not, though.

Men!